Part of Me Will Always Love Them?

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This past weekend I was with a group of friends who I've known since college and somehow this led us to a conversation on exes. (probably because we were all with different people when we met) And I had an interesting realization. I used to say that part of me would always love my first love and my ex-husband. (two different men) But I realized on Saturday that no I don't still love them in a romantic sense. I still care about them and wish them the best in life; well now I do since I've gotten past the I'd like to hit them with a shovel feeling. But I think it would be really unfair to J if part of me still loved them. Because to me that means that I can't give my whole heart to him. And he has my whole heart romantically speaking. Now part of this may seem a bit odd or silly but to me it is an important distinction. I think if you still have any feelings for an ex it can stir up trouble. Both J and I had resolved our issues before we got married so that made things much easier. But I truly believe you have to let go of the past before you can move to the future. And I think had I felt there was still a question for him I wouldn't have moved forward in our relationship.


What are your thoughts do exes still have a place in your hearts or do you have to let go to move on?

6th Bead Soup Blog Party

It's Coming!!!!

One Lovely Blog Award

Mrs. Duh over at The Misadventures of Mrs. Duh nominated me (and my blog) for The One Lovely Blog Award. I am honored. The One Lovely Blog Award is a "pay it forward" kind of way to recognize your favorite blogs. 

Here are the rules:

1. Post the award logo on your blog and link back to the person who nominated you.

2. Tell seven things about yourself.

3. Nominate up to 15 additional bloggers who you think deserve the award.

4. Post a comment on the blog of each nominee to tell them him/her they have been nominated.

Seven Things About Me

(some of these you might already know)

1. My brother is my hero. He has been since I was little. He is an amazing man, brother, and now husband to my wonderful sister-in-law. When I was about 13 I wrote him a poem called My Hero. I even wrote it using my limited calligraphy skills. He still has it in his home today. He was also Man of Honor in J and I's wedding.
2. I love sports! Well most of them...not too big a basketball fan except College b-ball during March Madness. I currently play in two Fantasy Football leagues and love it!
3. I can play both the bass guitar and the violin. Although it has been a while on either one so I'm not sure what it would sound like. On that same note I can read music to play an instrument but not for voice.
4. The nickname Churchy came from one of my husband's friends when he first started dating. J is a sailor and at points in his life had been a bit of a hmm how to say this...well a player. And when R heard that the girl he was going to date worked in a church and attended church on a regular basis he wasn't sure how that was going to work out with J. So he would refer to me as Churchy in conversation. To this day R is still embarrassed that I know. I obviously found it funny since I use it on my blog.
5. I am a procrastinator. I was told in college that it was due to the fact that I was really a perfectionist and if I put it off til the last minute it wouldn't be perfect and I could explain it as a rush job. I shrugged it off at the time because in my mind I'm far from a perfectionist. But more recently I've been noticing some perfectionist characteristics so we'll see.
6. I believe you get what you pay for in all things. And sometimes I'm ok getting something inexpensive because it works. Other times I want to get the quality item because it lasts.
7. I love writing, beading, and sewing. I find them to be a great outlet. But I often put them off because I just don't take the time to do them. Much like exercise I always feel better after I've done them even if it is just for a few minutes.

I Nominate...

(in no particular order)

Knit By God's Hand

Runs for Cookies

Honey, I Shrunk the Gretchen

Pretty Things

Jen Judd Rocks!

Beads for Busy Gals

Riding the Roller Coaster

Mrs. Alana's Miscellany

Love - Hate - Hair

I have a truly love-hate relationship with my hair. I have thick, long, very curly hair. As a child it was tangled most of the time and as an adult it still gets pretty tangled. I've tried it long, short, curly, permed, and straightened. I have only had a couple hairdressers who I felt really knew what they were doing. I'm struggling right now with my hairdresser I like what she does but her prices keep going up, up, up. Last time I was there it was $60 to get my hair cut because she prefers to wash it, blow dry it, and flat iron it before cutting. So I have an appointment with my friend's hairdresser to see what we can do. We'll see...but here are a few pictures of my hair over the past few years...my appointment is next Friday I'll post pics when she's done.

1998-1999ish after it had been set on rollers

2007 in England...my hair loves it there

2009 when I went SHORT and black J loved it!!

2011 at a friend's wedding

My current cut when it is straight...please ignore the I could kill you look

Game of Thrones

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It is hard to believe that the season finale of Game of Thrones was this past Sunday. It feels like the season just began but none the less it is here. (although this means it’s time for True Blood so I can’t really complain)

A few observations…

•  It is a well written show full of twists and turns you don’t see coming. 
• The Lannisters in general are a bunch of evil twisted people. 
• King Joffrey is particularly sinister but I feel he will get his in the end. 
• Arya Stark is very smart and knows how to play the game for the most part. 
• Daenerys and her dragons are kind of badass. I have a suspicion that she has what it takes to take back the throne. 
• It was tough being a woman during this time. 
• Mama Stark is not someone to be messed with. 
• They do a good job of making characters that you love to hate.
• Some of the special effects are amazing. 
• It sometimes gets tricky to keep up with all the storylines. 
• I haven’t finished the books so I can’t tell you how it compares to the books.

Why I Love America's Got Talent...

Last night this man tried out for America's Got Talent he's a vet who served for 14 years and was injured in Afghanistan and I'll let him tell you his full story...get your tissues

Dear Deployment

I'd like him home now.

Dear Deployment,

I'm kind of over you. Moreover I'm tired of being the mistress to you. I'm his wife dammit.

To be fair it was bound to happen if we're being honest it wasn't really a good match from the beginning. It didn't seem so bad in the beginning...on paper 3 years seems manageable but in reality you kind of suck. We made it through the first 7 months ok. Then we had a month reprieve from you...oh how sweet it was. But then you reared your ugly head and he had to return to you.

And now we're in our longest stretch of you...by the time he comes home again if you don't mess things up it will have been a year and a half that you've had him...you could share you know. I know he is an awesome and amazing man but he is mine and you are greedy and selfish. You have had him a long time and I would like him back.

I know I'm supposed to be the tough and strong Navy wife who can do it all but frankly I'm tired. I got married so I wouldn't have to do it all. And I'd like my best friend, my love, my lover, my handyman, my comedian, my cheerleader, and my husband back.

But I will say you've taught me some things along the way...I can fix a garbage disposal, a light switch, and change the high ceiling light bulbs. I can handle a hurricane, emergency surgery for my mother, emergency surgery for our fur baby Ares, my parents divorce, dealing with contractors, and in general running a household by myself. I know I can survive without him but I don't want to live without him.

And here's the kicker that I think you thrive on...as a Navy wife I'm proud as hell of my husband and what he does for our country, our family, and me! So I stand waiting for him to come home from you. I pray daily for his safety and the safety of his fellow crew members. I pray that he comes home safely and in a similar condition to when he left.

So there you have deployment...our relationship will continue out of duty and honor but know you are not on my top 10 list.

Sincerely,
A Navy Wife

MilSpouse First Friday Fill-In

1. What’s one thing in the past month you would have changed?

Getting to talk to my hubby more. We had some communication issues because of the ship and a port, etc so we haven't been able to talk as much.

2. What was your favorite thing that happened in May? 

Getting back to the gym and catching up with friends I haven't seen in a while.

3. June includes the first day of summer… what are your plans for the summer?

Work...some beach time...work...I'm trying to save up my vacation for when my husband comes home on R&R this fall.

4. Do you use the services on base (gym, financial planning, family services, daycare)? And if so, what’s your favorite one? (thanks to Shanon at Modern Meets Traditional for this question!)

I have used the gym once. It was ok but super crowded and not really easy to get to from my house. I've also used the family services to buy tickets to things like Busch Gardens which worked out well. I haven't used too much else. 

5. What are you looking forward to in June?

My YMCA training on their new system, a wine festival, and a belated Cinco de Mayo party.

Thanks for visiting! Now head on over to Wife of a Sailor and link up!