Disconnected...

Do you ever get disconnected from friends just due to life getting in the way? It isn't intentional. It just happens.

I have some friends who I was very close to a couple years ago and now we rarely talk to each other. When we do we love it and promise we'll do better in the future but work, families, etc happen and we lose touch again. And it is ok. I miss them but I know when it is time we will come back together. In the meantime we hold onto the knowledge that the other is there. I've had other friends come and go and now we're close as ever again. I trust there is a reason why some people are close to you at certain times. But it still saddens me slightly that we aren't as close as we once were...

When J and I got married I inherited...2 parents-in-law...7 siblings-in-law (5 of them have spouses)...and 13 nieces and nephews. I was all gung ho at the family reunion to get birthdays, anniversaries, addresses, etc for each of them to remain in contact and then I haven't. So I'm setting a goal while J is away to gain contact with his family. Keep them up to date on us, him, and me. We'll see...I still have the great idea of making a family calendar that has all the dates through out and then a list of addresses in back.

I think the problem is that there is so much stuff in our daily lives that when we get home we want to decompress and not deal with people. That might just be me...I love being at home with J and the puppies. I'm quite a home body now which is quite different from when I met J because I went out all the time. And I still enjoy that on occasion but I like being at home. Some friends have "blamed" J for my disappearance but really it is my choice. And when I'm home I don't want to be on the phone because I want to spend time with J. I am realizing that I do need to do a little bit of work on those relationships and it will happen in time.

The other thing I look at is they can call us too. J and I both have friends that grumble about how they never see us or hear from us. But they don't call us either so I think we are all busy with our lives.

Busy Week

Whew...it has been a busy week. We're getting ready to go out of town on vacation so there is laundry to do, clothes to pack, home to clean before, work to get done at work, etc all before leaving at O Dark Early 5:00 AM. It is a long drive it is best to start early.

So I've been busy catching up at work so I'm not so behind when I get back. And J has been doing laundry during the day while I'm at work (he's in between commands). Sorry it has been light this week.

It will be lighter next week because we are going to a camp ground with no technology. And frankly I'm glad it will be a nice break.

Catch you on the flip side!

Giveaway!!

For a fun sewing giveaway of the book Handmade Beginnings by Anna Maria Horner go to TaDa! Creations and enter to win a signed copy. It looks like a really good book for new mothers or for those of us who attend a lot of showers.

Rudeness in the Guise of Politeness

If you have to start a sentence with "don't take this the wrong way but..." or "I don't mean to be rude but..." or "with all due respect..." or "I"m not trying to be mean or nasty..." stop right there because what comes next will be taken the wrong way, rude, disrespectful, and/or mean and nasty. It amazes me how many people use those lines as a free pass to say whatever they want because they prefaced it with that.

The other day J and I were headed to a friend's son's birthday party and we realized we had forgotten the birthday card so we stopped at the grocery store. To save time J pulled up in front of the entrance to drop me off so I could run in then he drove around and came back to pick me up. Now our car was in front of the entrance for a minute dropping me off and a minute picking me up. I admit we were blocking the entrance a bit but only for a minute and you could still easily get in to the store. As we're leaving this woman stops and rolls down her window, J figures she needs directions or something so he rolls down his window. She says "I'm not trying to be mean or nasty or anything but...you could have moved your car down so that you weren't blocking the entrance instead of stopping right there. Because I had to walk around your car to get out." J looked at her a little stunned and politely said "have a nice day." We were just surprised that she felt the need to say anything. And the fact that she prefaced it with "I'm not trying to mean or nasty..." tells me that she did mean to be mean or nasty about the fact. We shrugged it off and went about our day but it got me thinking about other people I know who use similar lines before saying something hurtful.

I will fully admit I've said some not nice things in my day. But usually I'm blatantly honest which is a flaw...so don't ask me a question you don't want an honest answer to...you may not like it. I think part of it is the fact that society says you can say whatever you want to say....it is so important it is an amendment. I agree you should have freedom of speech. However, just as the saying goes...the freedom of speech doesn't give you the right to walk into a crowded theater and yell fire if there isn't one. And I think that the freedom of speech does give you the right to say whatever you want but I don't think that means you don't have filters.

My Granny used to say..."think before you speak because you can't take it back."

Do you ever encounter people who preface something mean with..."don't take this the wrong way but..." or "I don't mean to be rude but..." or "with all due respect..." or "I"m not trying to be mean or nasty..."? And does it really make what comes next any better?

Are we too exposed?

Facebook, Twitter, My Space, My Yahoo, Blogs, Dating Sites, Photo sharing sites, work websites, etc. our information is everywhere. We share updates, photos, bios, and stories with the world on the world wide web but has this left us and our information vulnerable. Thanks to Facebook and Twitter updates I can tell you who's on vacation, who's husband is out of town, who's out of their house running errands, how many children someone has, and in some cases a vague idea of where someone lives without a lot of effort.

Now I am not paranoid about being out on the internet...I met my husband through Yahoo Personals, I blog regularly, I use Shutterfly to print my photos, I design and am mentioned on my work website, I have a rarely used Facebook account, and an even less used My Space account. I've avoided Twitter for the most part...I signed up to follow someone and decided it would drive me nuts so I quit. I admit though, that I'm cautious about what I put out there. I don't mention my husband's name on my blog. Although I'm not sure why other than his privacy. I put pictures of us out on my blog and my Facebook site (particularly pics of my puppies). But I admit I don't put a lot of details about us on my Facebook site. And I edit what I put out on my blog so it is personal and yet not detailed.

But you do hear of online stalking, false profiles on dating sites, and other scams. So the question arises have we made ourselves too vulnerable with online information? Once we put it online it is permanent we can't take it back and it is open to everyone who wants to see it.

So what do you think do the pros outweigh the cons when it comes to an online presence?     

Bead Soup Blog Party

I am participating in the Bead Soup Blog Party. I'm excited this is my first one. So today I'm posting a preview teaser of what I sent my partner, Elisabeth. I'm looking forward to seeing all the neat creations in June.

Jewelry Creations

I thought I would share some pictures of things I've made in the past in preparation for my upcoming Bead Soup Blog Party piece. I sent my beads off to Elisabeth of Beads for Busy Gals I plan on posting about that tomorrow...

The necklace from the first formal bead class I took.

Necklace based on a picture of flowers.

Woven Fiber & Bead Necklace

One Too Many Strands Necklace

Hair Pins & Combs for my Sister-in-Law when she was Matron of Honor in her sister's wedding

My Creations

When my husband and I were on our "honeymoon weekend" in Nag's Head I drug him to a bead shop on the way home. Well he found stuff he liked too...so we bought a shark's tooth (wire wrapped) and some other beads including lava rock to make him a necklace. This necklace has had a rough go of it...the first time I made it, the first time he wore it it broke, fortunately we saved most of the beads and I could remake it. When I remade it the clasp kept popping open and he actually lost it over the weekend but we found it. So I bought a huge lobster claw clasp to fix it. And since I've fixed it...no issues.

I have been busy cutting out all the fabric I have that has a pattern with it. I find it easier if I do bulk cutting and then bulk sewing. Last night I completed one of my purses, the Buttercup Bag by Made by Rae. I love this pattern it was well written and so easy to follow!! But I'm having a problem with the snap being a bit too tough for this fabric so I may have to reinforce it a bit. We'll see. I used a batik fabric that I love from Sew Batik.

Some of My Favorite Blogs

I read a number of blogs daily (well I try to anyway) and I thought I would share some of my favorites...here are a few...more to come later...

SoMi Speaks - I enjoy reading this blog because she covers a variety of topics from current events, to running, to her adorable dog. She has a way of writing that makes you feel like she is sitting there talking to you about it. And on Fridays she does a Replay of articles seen around the internet. And when you comment she is always good about replying to you.

Just Another Day in {our midwest} Paradise - I started reading this before J and I got married and found her antidotes about being a military wife of a deployed soldier, a dog owner, and a law student amusing. Now she writes about their home, their dogs, and being a lawyer. She also has amazing recipes (not totally healthy) but amazing.

*Bitch Cakes*: A Neurotic Glamour Girl's Weight Watchers Experience and Fitness Adventures 

- I found this when I started Weight Watchers and her story is very inspiring for someone trying to lose weight. She has had her ups and downs and is very honest about that. It is a great site with lots of great tips and inspiring stories. She also takes great pictures.

marta writes - I started reading her blog when I took her workshop. She has great advice about blogging, crafting as a business mixed in with personal antidotes about her family. She has a great contents page that allows you to search through her archives.

Our First Wedding

J and I had two weddings one in Indiana at his family reunion for his family who all lives up north and one down here in Virginia for my family and our friends. The first wedding was at a camp ground and we went with our Harley Clothes. The second one was formal in a church...those pictures will come another day. Both days were very special for us because of who was there on both occasions.

We wanted this wedding to be a surprise to his family so we told one sister who told another sister. But it was a surprise to his parents and other siblings. The funny part is the day we told them his Mom gave him the 3rd degree about his intentions toward me and that I deserved better and he shouldn't string me along, etc. So she was a little sheepish the night we announced it.

So our first wedding...

Some of my favorite things...

For sensitive skin you can not beat this skin care line...boscia is amazing! I tried the Normal to Dry kit first because it was winter time and my skin is dry in the winter. It includes: 

- Soothing Cleansing Cream - so gentle and cleansing that even when my rosacea flairs I can still use it.
- Balancing Facial Tonic - nice and refreshing but no sting
- Vital Daily Moisture SPF 15 - a nice light moisture that doesn't effect make-up
- Recharging Night Moisture - a soothing, slightly heavier moisturizer
- 1 pack of Lavender Blotting Linens - great for touch ups
 
And now that the weather is warming up (in theory it is currently 67 degrees outside) I need something a little more on the oil free side. So I bought the:
- Purifying Cleansing Gel - so gentle but deep cleansing enough to get the junk of summer off.
- Oil-free Daily Hydration - Nice and light so it doesn't cause breakouts
- Recharging Night Moisture - see above
 
If you are looking for a new skin care regimen this is it. And the cool thing is Sephora will give you samples to try. It is a little pricier but my dermatologist said skin care particularly your moisturizer should be top shelf because it stays on all day.

And for those of you with naturally curly hair...TreSemme' Flawless Curls Mousse can't be beat. It helps calm and sooth your hair with great hold. If you use too much or don't get it mixed in well it can be a tad crunchy but a little scrunching and it goes away. The best part...you can get it at your local drug store for under $10.

I'd rather have a root canal...

source: thedentistreviews.com

I used to use this line often when refering to something horrible I didn't want to do...until I had a root canal...then I stopped saying it.

Last Monday I woke up with a tooth ache. I kind of thought I just got something caught so I ignored it. It was dull but with some swelling. So Wednesday I dreadingly called the base dentist only to learn they only see active duty people. And furthermore I should have enrolled in Tricare Dental already but since I haven't it won't be active until June 1st. So I ask about my toothache. They can see me for emergency care. So I go in...they think one tooth may be dead but the tests are inconclusive. So I have to take Advil and come back on Tuesday of this week.

Yesterday I go in and see a very pleasant resident (its a training clinic) who does some tests but still inconclusive. So she calls in one of the upper dentists. Who does the same tests. And apparently I'd been responding to stimulus that wasn't there. So he decided the smart thing is to yell at me about it..."You have got to work with me, we're trying to make sure we work on the right tooth because otherwise we drill the wrong tooth. You're giving me a bunch of malarkey here. If you keep it up I'll be sending you home in pain and not doing anything for you even though you obviously need help." So we tried again. And I did ok and then I responded when he hadn't hit the tooth again. So another lecture. Finally they determined that the tooth behind my canine tooth was dead and would need root canal. But they couldn't do that until today so they were going to send me home. Well the fabulous doctor determined that my resident needed to cut my gum and get the infection out. And proceeded to go into detail about what to do to my gum in the room with me...I about jumped out of the chair at the description. Whoo hoo that was fun! Soft diet for the night (but I'm ok with that Spaghettios here we come) and return at 0700 for the root canal.

So this morning I get up with J for work...and head to the dentist. Two hours later my root canal isn't quite done but they send me out so they can get to the next appointment. And I'll have to go back later to finish it. So I come to work with half my face (all the way up to my eyelid) numb. That wasn't so bad...but now three hours later the novicane is wearing off and the pain is coming back and I can't take another dose of pain meds until 2:30 this afternoon. I'm happy!!

I will say this whole experience has made me remember why I loved going from military dentists to private dentists when Dad retired. I know the military is nice to give us health care for free but it has its issues too.

J was a dream last night - fixing dinner, clean-up afterwords, etc.

Coming Soon...

Pictures of my creations....I've been busy working on projects both beaded and fabric. And this week I will be posting pictures.

Also I'm officially looking into the ins and outs of selling my creations. Wish me luck.

Iron Man 2

On Saturday night we went to see Iron Man 2 in IMAX. It was excellent! If you are a comic book fan and or a fan of the first one...go see it. Oh and stay through the credits...there is something after it.

Mother's Day...

On Sunday at church our pastor preached a sermon about God our nurturing mother...it was an interesting concept that not only is God our all powerful father but God is also our all nurturing mother who gives us a home. I'm still trying to get a good grasp so when I get the sermon notes I may have another post.

He opened the sermon with the following questions...

• where is home for you?  J and I both answered that our house is our home. It is the place where we belong and feel most at home because of who is there.
• what is one thing you remember or think of about home? Each other
• what is Mom's first name and/or what is your Dad's nickname for her? In my case...Jill & Mom. In his case Judith & Judy Tudy (she'd hate that being published)
• what was one really good thing about your Mom growing up? In my case...her being home when I came home from school and chocolate chip cookies. In his case..talking to his Mom.

We are both blessed with amazing mothers who have been there through it all and loved us just the same. And now we are both blessed with wonderful mother-in-laws. Whenever we talk to his mom which isn't as often as it should be I love it. She is so sweet. And because we live near my parents I see my parents all the time.

So what about you....where is home for you? what is the one thing you remember or think of about home? what is your Mom's first name or your Dad's nickname for her? what was one really good thing about your Mom growing up?

Some things are worth letting go...

Growing up every Spring we had Spring cleaning that included sorting through clothes, toys, craft supplies, fabric, notions, etc. (my mother was an avid seamstress) and of course cleaning away the cobwebs and dust. My mother has increased the frequency of this since my brother and I have moved out. She is constantly sorting through things to see what can go. I know one day I will appreciate this...and I admit I too sort.

Every time I bring out my summer clothes or my winter clothes I sort through to see what I can give away or throw away. Every time I've moved I sort through papers, magazines, dishes, kitchen ware, clothes, shoes, purses, etc. and there is always a good sized pile of things that end up leaving. When I bought them "I couldn't live without them" but now I don't need them. And interestingly enough I've learned over time that letting go of something (or someone) makes room for something else (or someone else).

A few examples:

My divorce was final in June of 2004. Since that time I had dated, tried connecting with different guys but none worked out. In February of 2008 I spoke to a jeweler about either selling off my engagement ring and wedding band or making them into something else. That was on a Friday. The next day I met J and the rest is history. I believe it is because of letting go of the past that I was finally able to move on to the future.

I have often held onto clothes that were too small because I might fit back into them. I have found on many occasions that when I get rid of them that is when I start to lose weight. Ironic in a sense but I think it is the process of accepting yourself where you are and loving yourself the way you are that allows you to let go of the weight.

I do not equate people with things...people are not objects. That being said I think there are times when you have to let go of a person or a relationship to allow new people and relationships in. There have been a few too many relationships (and people) that I have clung to in hopes that it would get better or they would change. But sometimes although you were once good for each other you are no longer good for each other. And sometimes this can be a romantic relationship, a friendship, an acquaintance, and in some cases even a family member. The beauty is that sometimes when you let go...it works out that the relationship can be rebuilt.

One of my favorite quotes is "Let Go and Let God"... 
 
 Sometimes you just have to let go. Do you have anything or anyone that you have had to let go? 

LOST....

Thanks to a wonderful thing called Netflix I've been going back and watching the earlier seasons of LOST. My husband thinks I should of done this before I ever started watching but to be honest I wasn't into it that much in the beginning I just watched it because he did. Now I get it. With a bit more history (or back story) it is much more interesting and it makes a lot more sense. So I'm on episode 12 of season One (yeah I have a lot to go). And we watched the current episode last night.

Some observations: *SPOILER ALERT* Don't read if you haven't watched and don't want to know what happened.

• First we suspected that John was not good and was up to something bad.
• It was sad to lose Sayid, Sun, and Jin especially the way we lost them. The fact that Jin stayed when he could have left was a bittersweet moment. The island has brought people back so we'll see.
• Having Kate and Sawyer hurt seems like they could be next to go but they do have Jack to help them so we'll see. 
• We suspect that the other reality is going to cross the island reality soon but we're not sure how.
• We suspect that Claire is going to be the end of John.
• We suspect that Jacob is going to be the evil on the island and that "the man in black" is going to be the good. 
• We suspect John is the new Jacob and Desmond will be the new "man in black"
• Smokey/John has a weak spot but we don't know what it is. (Maybe they have to be in the temple)
• Desmond may well be the key to getting off the island and/or destroying John.
• There are still many surprises to come....

Book Review: Body Clutter

I've decided to start reading more and I figure if I'm reading something good I'll share it with you guys. So today's book...

Body Clutter by Marla Cilley and Leanne Ely is a must read if you have weight issues or body issues. I have gone to the Fly Lady to learn how to get my house in order using "baby steps" and the wonderful ladies who brought us advice on keeping our house clean now focus on getting our ultimate home in order. Interestingly enough their theory is that they are related. The clutter in your home and the clutter on your body are related to many of the same issues.

Throughout the book they have Body Clutter journal suggestions. I haven't done all the journal stuff but the information in the book is brilliant. They use word associations like FLY (Finally Loving Yourself) and HALT (Don't allow yourself to get too Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired). They tell you that you have control not the potato chips, the cookies, or the cake. They tell you to avoid "Stinking Thinking" the negative thoughts that we can so often fall victim to.

Monster Trucks and Cinco de Mayo...

Or what I did this weekend...

Last time J's sister M and her fiance J were over my J offered to take him out this past weekend for his final hurrah of sorts. So Friday night M's fiance came over and the guys went out bar hopping. They had a good time even though some of the bars were a bit dead for a Friday. While they were out I finished the jewelry I was making for J's sister for her maid of honor. It was a good night for the puppies and I, they laid around and I got a lot done. Normally Ares goes in his crate and Eva just roams the downstairs but with M's fiance spending the night on the couch we realized that they would need to sleep upstairs. I made up the couch and headed to bed. We (the puppies and I) were all peacefully sleeping when the guys got home. The dogs went nuts barking and whining. So needless to say it was a late night with little sleep. M loved the jewelry and thinks her sister (the maid of honor) will love it too.

Saturday we woke up around 8:00 AM with the puppies ready to go. So we got up made coffee, etc. J had a to-do list of stuff he wanted to get done around the house. But he wasn't really motivated so he sat and sat. We had a friend's son's birthday party to go to at 2:00 PM that day so he felt his day was shot time wise and he postponed the list to Sunday. So we went to Lowe's to get supplies for the projects and then to Target for a birthday present for our friend's son. He is a four year old boy...what does he like Monster Trucks...so we got him a monster truck race set with an additional monster truck. We also bought his older brother a monster truck so he could play too. It was fun shopping for him. Then home to get ready to go to the party. We got there and it was a nice quiet party. Good food of hot dogs and hamburgers and a yummy cake!!

Then we came home to let our neighbors dog out and get ready for our next event. We headed to our friends' annual Cinco de Mayo party. We had so much fun. J was the designated driver so I had a few (too many) margaritas. It was a lot of fun that night but not so much fun the next morning. It took me most of the day to feel normal. J however felt great and got his list knocked out including installing an awesome new fan in our living room. Oh what a wonderful difference it makes. And he makes it look so easy to just throw it up there and go. And it has a remote (we have high ceilings) so you can adjust the speed easily. It helped cool down the house but we still ended up turning on the AC to help cool down the puppies. We ordered in dinner and watched Celebrity Apprentice.

I'm trying to get up to date on previous seasons of Lost before the series finally. And thanks to Netflix I can get all the previous seasons instantly. It is great so we watched episodes all afternoon. I know I'm a little behind but it seems fitting to catch up before it goes off.