Be True to Yourself

I watched the movie "What's Your Number?" last night and it is a funny and sweet movie that I recommend. It was definitely worth the watch. Without giving away the story too much the main character was trying to find Mr. Right by going back through her exes. And she was also trying to find herself and her future.

Part of the story line was how she changed herself to fit each guy. And I got to thinking about how many of us have done or do that in our romantic lives. I started looking back at my exes and my relationship with them. The main one was my ex-husband he wanted a quiet, demure, Mrs. Beaver type housewife, who had the house spotless and dinner on the table all while wearing pearls. He wanted a very conservative wife both in personality and dress. I tried desperately for 7 years to be that person until I woke up and realized that was not who I was, who I wanted to be, or who I should be.

After our divorce I dated another ex (seemed like a good idea at the time) which ended up in me trying to conform once again to his needs. When that relationship ended. I spent some much needed time single. During this time I looked deep into myself to determine who I was, what made me happy, what ticked me off, and what I couldn't care less about. I realized where I stood politically, where I stood on major issues, and where I stood on silly stuff. I realized a lot about myself in the two years I took off from dating. Then after much thought and work on myself I jumped back into the dating pool. I thought I had it all under control.

But I realized I was slipping into my old habits with a guy I was interested in. I was getting into things he was interested in to impress him. Old Megan was coming back. So I stepped away again while I got my head right. Then I took a leap and went back into the online dating world again. I put my faith in God and my gut. If I listened to both I knew I would find the right guy for me who loved me for me.

I did. I found my husband. He loves me for who I am, where I am. He isn't trying to find 100 ways to change me. In our per-marital counseling when asked what we would change about each other. He said "absolutely nothing she's perfect to me." Yeah he scored points. But what we realized is that we loved each other as we were and we wanted to grow together. That doesn't mean we won't change. Change is inevitable but we want to change and grow together not change each other. 

Starbucks Makes Me Happy

I realize that I can brew coffee (this morning I got regular coffee and added my own Sugar in the Raw and half and half, both of which I have at home) and make oatmeal at home but there is something so wonderful about Starbucks coffee and oatmeal on my desk that it just makes the start to my day better. I might have a problem...I'm ok with this.

Priorities

I learned that we can do anything, but we can't do everything... at least not at the same time. So think of your priorities not in terms of what activities you do, but when you do them. Timing is everything.  ~ Dan Millman

I am trying to determine my priorities so I can make better use of my time. Here is the list of things I'd like to do...(no particular order)

• Getting my house cleaned thoroughly
• Sewing
• Beading
• Exercising
• Menu planning
• Training the dogs
• Taking the dogs for long walks
• Getting my yard under control

Things I have to do...

• Go to work
• Take care of the dogs/cats
• Eat

I work from 9-6 Monday through Thursday and 9-3 on Friday. It doesn't allow a bunch of time in the evenings. On Thursday I lead a Bible study in the evening. I try to take a yoga class once a week. Lately though I just haven't felt like I've had time to things I want. So I'm trying to look at my schedule and see what I can rearrange to accommodate more of what I would like to do in with what I have to do. So that is my goal for February...figure out how to incorporate more of the likes into my life.

 

Branching Out

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I find it interesting how foods become buzz foods so to speak. The one I keep seeing all over the place is brussels sprouts. And these are not your mama's brussels sprouts. These are gloriously green and crisp looking not overcooked and mushy. (sometimes hidden under artificial cheese goo) I have shunned brussels sprouts for years because I thought they were gross and mushy green balls. But seeing these recipes I've decided to branch out and try them. I'm debating which recipe to try because there are a few that look stunning. I figure if I can change my mind about asparagus (I used to think it was mushy and gross until I had it grilled) then I can change my mind about brussels sprouts.

I have three recipes I'm contemplating...

• Weight Watchers' Roasted Brussels Sprouts with Maple-Balsamic Drizzle 

• Eat, Live, Run's Brussels Sprouts with bacon, dried cherries, and Israeli Couscous

• Pioneer Woman's Brussels Sprouts with Balsamic and Cranberries

I'm leaning toward the Pioneer Woman's recipe because I've never had a recipe from her that I didn't like but the others sound heavenly too so I may have to try them all. Now I have to decide if I'll buy them already off the stalk or buy them on the stalk and cut them myself.

So what are somethings that you're trying new this year? 

If You Want to Make the Military Laugh...

...tell them your plans.

J and I had made tentative plans for him to come home this fall for R and R but due to some schedule changes this is not looking good and it is likely he won't be home at all this year. We knew that this was a potential issue but we hoped it would work out. I know that the military doesn't try to mess up family plans and that they are actually quite supportive of Geo Bachelors so I'm not upset with them. But I confess I'm upset at the situation because that means it will be over a year (more like 18 months) before I see him again. I've decided though that wallowing in it will do me no good. But I admit I did do some shopping therapy and some eating therapy in the process.

Now I have decided instead of dwelling on things I don't have control over, that I'm going to focus on what I do have control over...myself. I have been on a weird eating binge and a lack of exercise binge for quite some time. So last week I had class two of the weight loss Bible study (I lost 3.5 lbs) I lead and between that and my body grumbling I'm looking to get back on track. I've been doing better with eating (most days). So now I just have to get off my butt and get moving. I've been doing yoga which is helping my stress level but I need to get back to walking and other cardio. Plus I want to get back to strength training. The kicker is I don't quite have the motivation to do it yet. But I've signed up to do an 8K on March 17th so I need to get the motivation.

Closings

In our area there are restaurants closing left and right. Last year we lost Firken Frigate, James Town Pie Co., Beamer's Grill, Silver Diner, Jo Jack's Coffee, and a number of other smaller restaurants. This year has brought the closing of Red Star Tavern and Saddleridge. I get that times are tough and so I'm not too surprised about the closings what I'm surprised about is the way they go about closing. They don't tell their employees and so when the employees show up for work the doors are locked. I understand that closing is tough on everyone but it just surprises me that they don't give employees a head's up. I hope this is the end of closings for a while but I fear more are to come.

When Cultures Clash

So I have a dilemma... it's not really a dilemma because I know what I'm going to do but it is a culture clash none the less.

Our season opera tickets for Orphee fall on Super Bowl Sunday. {gasp} I've had season opera tickets since 2002. It used to be my father-daughter date and now thanks to the divorce it is my mother-daughter date. Anywhoo back to the point...I'm a pretty big football fan I consistently root for the Patriots and have well before they started actually winning Super Bowls. I play in two Fantasy Football leagues and I came in 2nd in one league and 3rd in the other. I haven't missed a Super Bowl in years...and I mean years.

Now the good news is the opera is at 2:30 PM but it is an hour away if traffic cooperates and it goes until 5:30 PM. So I'll still get to watch most of the Super Bowl but I'll miss the pre-game stuff. So my plan at this point is to go to the opera and then go to a friend's house to watch the majority of the game.

My wonderful husband's response was "well I'm sure the opera people don't think anyone there would be so average as to like football." He likes to pick on me for my eclectic mix of interests. It is part of what he loves about me...but he loves to pick on my dichotomy.

So what are you doing for the Super Bowl? Do you care who's in it or do you just like the fun of it? Or could you care less?

Customer Service

I admit it floors me that a number of stores and restaurants aren't stepping up their service right now. It seems like it is going down in some cases. Recently I've had very mixed experiences. For example...

California Pizza Kitchen... both times I've been there recently their service has been above and beyond. Food has been great, correct, and came out quickly. We even found a manager to let him know how good things were.

Cracker Barrel...a group of four of us went for breakfast on a Saturday they were busy but not crazy. Some of us arrived a bit later so they said they were waiting well she disappeared. Then once we got food she was spotty with refills and actually another server took better care of us. So overall the experience was good but not because of our server. So we told the clerk and the manager about it. The manager was a bit concerned but pleased with the other server who picked up the slack.

Mole Hole...it is a small shop that sells different stuff like Pandora jewelry, cute clothes, and other little things that you don't need but are fun. The main reason I've gone in there is because of Pandora but after having multiple experiences with different sales people being rude, hurried, snooty, etc I'm done shopping there. I sent them an email and the owner sent an apology email but I feel it is too little too late.

Pandora...a new Pandora store opened up near by...this is bad. But the service is amazing!! They go above and beyond to make you happy. I can't recommend them enough.

Harley Davidson...a lot of people have a preconceived notion of what to expect when they go into a Harley store. I'm always amazed at how friendly, helpful, and pleasant the experience is even if they are hectic and busy they still give you undivided attention while waiting on you.

Eddie Bauer...I have shopped Eddie Bauer for years...in the store and in the catalog and over all their service has been good. What I love is if you are unhappy with your purchase for any reason even after wearing it they will take it back. I try not to wear things and return them if I can avoid it but I love knowing I can if needed.

What are some places that have given you great service? What are some that have given so-so service?

25 Questions for a Military Spouse

I have seen this on a number of blogs this week but the most recent was The Misadventures of Mrs. Duh it was fun to read the answers so I thought why not?


1. How did you and your spouse meet?

We met online through Yahoo personals. I saw his picture one night in November and thought he was cute so I sent him a nudge. Well in December my membership was up so I decided not to renew it (or so I thought). I actually signed up for an in person dating service and went on a few dates through that with no success. So I was surprised when I got a response to my nudge the end of January. He and I started talking by IM. Then he asked me out on a date. So on February 9th I went out on date with a jerk of a guy because I had already had it set up by the dating service and couldn't cancel. Then I went on a date with J. Our date was at his house (I know not the best decision but I trusted my instinct). I knew I was in trouble from the moment I met him. I knew he was the one. The next day we spent the day together and we decided to be exclusive. The rest is history so to speak.

2. How old were you when you two met?

I was 30 he was 31.

3. How long have you been together?

4 years as of this February

4. Where are you and your spouse originally from?


He's a Detroit boy born and raised. I was born at the Air Force Academy in Colorado.

5. How did you feel about him joining the military?


He was already in when I met him. Fortunately he was on shore duty.



6. Where did your spouse go to basic training?


To be honest I don't know.


7. Has your spouse ever been deployed?



He deployed to Iraq for 6 months (I was not with him for the first deployment) and is currently in Japan.

8. Ever been to his promotion ceremony?


Nope but I still have my fingers crossed.

9. How long have you been a military wife?


2 years and 4 months



10. Did you marry him before or after he joined?


Well after he joined


11. How did your husband propose?


Kind of a funny story. When we first started dating I wanted the ring and the proposal. But the more I thought about it I decided that I didn't really want that because I'd had it with my first marriage and it didn't work out so well. He and I had had conversations about getting married so we both knew where the other stood.

We had started looking at his next duty assignment and one of his options was Japan as a geobachelor. So we knew we wanted to get married before he left. His family is mostly up north but my family (except my brother and his wife) and our friends are mostly down south. (Ironic for a Northern girl) So we were headed to his family reunion and we decided (per my Mom's suggestion) that we would get married at his reunion. So he talked to my Dad and got his permission and one night while we were in bed talking he looks at me and said "so do you want to marry me?" I smiled and said "of course."


12. Where did you get married?

Our first wedding was at his family reunion. We surprised his family with the news.when we got there after his Mom gave him the 3rd degree about when he was going to marry me. So I arranged for a minister to come to the camp ground and marry us. We also had him serve communion to everyone as part of the service. We got there early and went into town to get the license and talk to the minister. It was a beautiful day in a pavilion on a lake shore.

Our second wedding was back at our "home" church. It was a beautiful ceremony that meant a lot to us because every Sunday we sit in the same sanctuary we got married in. As a side note this can be a bad thing when he is deployed.

13. How old were you when you got married?


I was 31, he was 32


14. Did he wear his uniform on your wedding day?

I left that up to him and he decided to wear a tux. He looked amazing!!


15. Where are you and your spouse currently stationed?


He is stationed at Yokosuka Naval Base, Japan. I'm still near Little Creek Amphibious Base, Norfolk


16. Do you live on base?



No I live in our house and he lives in an apartment off base.

17. How long were you married when you had to go through your first separation?



We celebrated our first year in the beginning of September and he left the end of September of the same year.


18. What is your favorite base so far?


Since he and I have only been stationed at one base together. I'm going back to my days as an Air Force brat and saying Elemendorf Air Force Base. I loved Alaska!!

19. Do you think your spouse looks good in his uniform?

I joke with him that I only married him for the uniform. I'm kidding but he does look good in his uniforms. (the Navy has a lot of them)

20. Do you think military life is more advanced then civilian life?


No just different. We experience things that civilians don't and they often don't understand. J's family still doesn't fully grasp how it works to have him across the world.


21. Do you like the benefits you receive as a military spouse?


Heck yeah!! The health/dental insurance, the commisary, the exchange, and the connection with other spouses is great!


22. Do you have a lot of military wife friends?


I have a number of friends with spouses in other branches and some whose spouses have retired and I've connect with a number of them online. I think it helps a lot to have people who get it.


23. What is the hardest part of the military life?


The separation from your spouse. I knew I was signing up for this but it still has tough days.



24. Do you own military wife stuff?


I own one tank that says "sexually deprived for your freedom" it is well loved in this area. And I steal his stuff and wear it too.

25. Do you support your spouse as a member of the military?


100% I am so proud of what he does for me, our family, and our country. I wouldn't have married him if I didn't support him in what he does. I think it also helped that I was a military brat.

The First Step is Admitting You Have a Problem

Hi! My name is Megan and I'm addicted to...

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Fruit Ninjas - I have my friend T to blame for this she showed it to me the other night when we were at a friend's birthday party. It is a highly addictive game. So be warned but go check it out.

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Once Upon a Time - So the writers of LOST have sucked me in again. I love this show it has great characters, a great story, and a great concept. If you haven't started watching I encourage you to go check it out.

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Teavana - I have always loved tea. I in particular love loose tea. And I have discovered Teavana I love the fact that you can mix teas or just drink them on their own. One of my favorites is the White Ayurvedic Chai and Samurai Chai Mate blend. The nice part is it is nice and light so you can drink it straight, with a bit of sugar, or with cream and sugar. If you are a tea person I highly recommend you check them out.

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Blue Bloods - Tom Selleck and Donnie Wahlberg...give me a moment...ok I'm back. Seriously though this is a well written cop show that includes a multi-generational Sunday dinner. I really like this show and how the family story runs behind the cop story. Apparently Donnie Wahlberg is a clown on set. Check it out.

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Pole Dancing - If ever there was an exercise that didn't feel like an exercise this is it. But it is a great workout! It is also sexy, fun, empowering, therapeutic, and it gives you girl power. I encourage you to take a class near you!

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Yoga - My mom did yoga for years when I was growing up and she's offered to teach me. But I admit as much as I love my mom there are some things that it is better if someone else teaches you. So in November I tried Hot Yoga and needless to say that didn't go so well. But I love yoga so I'm continuing to take classes with the goal of increasing my hold in Downward Dog.

So what are some of your addictions?

All I Need to Learn...I Learned from My Pit Bulls

• Do not judge based on the looks of a person (pit bull) they are very loving and well behaved (most of the time) and they too want to please you.

 

•  Just because you are small doesn't mean you can't tackle something big. Even as a puppy Ares was willing to tackle a big bone or big rope.

 

• Be patient with those younger than you they have not had your experiences or your wisdom (I still don't have that) but you can teach them.

• Rest...your health is important and sleep is good.

•  A lovable face will get you far in life (and out of trouble) but use it wisely. So will kisses.

•  Don't take yourself too seriously.

•  Sharing is good.

•  Stay alert. And greet people with enthusiasm.

•  Sometimes you are a princess and that is ok.

So what have you learned from your dog(s) or other pets?

Time...

I am fascinated by time...

It always seems like I should have more of it and yet I don't. In a day it seems like I get up...take care of the dogs...get my breakfast...talk to J on the phone (while he's in port)...get ready for work...work...come home...take care of the dogs...get my dinner...watch a bit of tv (or go to a yoga class, etc)...then get ready for bed and start all over again.

When J left I had these illusions that I would have all this time to bead and sew and get stuff done around the house but I just don't seem to have the time or the energy. I wish I knew how to find the time and/or the energy. Part of it is just doing it instead of just thinking about doing it. But it just seems like time gets away from me so easily.

And yet when it comes to the count down of J coming home it seems like forever away. But at work we have a calendar meeting this week and so we are talking about our events for the year. So I know this year will fly by like they always do. We are in January and yet soon it will be June and then September and then December again. It is funny how time just ticks by.

So what about you guys does time stand still or fly by?

New Year's Resolutions 2011 vs 2012

5.) Okay okay I have to ask…what are your New Year’s Resolutions for 2012 and/or how did 2011′s resolutions turn out?


I didn't set formal Resolutions for 2011 but my informal Resolutions included:

• Getting healthier - I realize now that this is very general and I should have specified a bit more but I took steps to get healthier. In January I decided to lead a a weight loss Bible Study called First Place 4 Health that covered the balancing my life. As part of First Place it encourages you to exercise and follow the Food Pyramid for eating.
• Walking at least two 5Ks - In 2011 I walked three 5Ks (The Wounded Warrior 5K, the Newport News Shipbuilding 5K, and the Frosty 5K)
• Cook at home more often - I admit this was my hardest. When J was home it was easy I planned the menu and did the grocery shopping (he'd go sometimes too) and he would cook the meals.
• Getting our debt paid down - We are doing better on this but there is still a lot to get through.

Here are my Resolutions for 2012

• To read the Bible daily and do my Bible Study daily instead of all in one day. I'll admit I haven't gotten off to a great start on this. But it is early.
• To walk regularly so I'm ready for the 8K, 10K and possible 10 miler that I want to do in 2012. It has been freezing cold in the mornings so I'm reluctant to take my big babies dogs out for walks because they don't like the cold. And it is far more tempting to cuddle with them than to get up and go to the gym. I know I need to work on this.
• To eat healthier and to start eliminating artificial foods from my every day diet. I'm doing better with this because even when I eat out I'm picking real foods.
• To create a meal plan and to cook at home more often. I haven't started this yet I need to get my kitchen cleaned out of the junk that I don't want or need then I'll be off.
• To get our credit cards paid off. We are working on a plan for this. I think we are going to use Mint.com to help us out.
• To take some classes to expand my knowledge for work. I'm looking at schedules to figure out when I can take these.
• To continue yoga and dance classes. And to add weight lifting to my weekly schedule. Wednesday night I went back to Yoga...Thursday my body reminded me I went back to Yoga...Saturday I'm signed up for a dance class.

Thank you to Mama Kat for the writing prompt!! I encourage you to head over to her site and check it out and join up!

Team Loyalty Gone Too Far

View more videos at: http://nbcnewyork.com.

I'm all for team loyalty to your favorite team. I cheer for the Red Sox, the Patriots (New England Girl), and the Red Wings (hubby's from Detroit). I have a vested interest in Football because of playing Fantasy Football. I love watching hockey and I'll admit I'm ok with a fight or two on the ice. 

But when you decided to beat someone because their team won and yours lost then it has gone too far. Monday Night after the Winter Classic a New York Rangers fan who was also a former Marine and off-duty cop was beaten by three Philadelphia Flyers fans to the point that he needed stitches and has a concussion. I will say that people did try to stop the guys from Philadelphia and they tried to help the Rangers fans.

Seriously over a stupid hockey game? I'm sure alcohol was involved and I'm sure things were said by both sides but that's where it should stop. No one should end up in the hospital because of a game.

Here's another article.

What are your thoughts?

When He's In Port

This is from our first wedding. I love his smile...me not so much.

Currently my husband's ship is in port. This means I get to talk to him daily on the phone. Sometimes I get to talk to him twice daily. I realize it will come to an end at some point but for now I will enjoy every minute of it!! It is amazing to me how much just hearing his voice makes the separation a little better. Next we have to work up to Skype. He got a laptop for Christmas that has a webcam so we're half way there.

Any Skype tips?

Happy New Year!!

It is still hard for me to believe that it is 2012. It seems like we just started 2011. (It's also hard to believe I'll have to work a mostly full week this week.)

I'm looking forward to 2012 my hubby comes home for R&R in the fall so that is my main excitement but I have others I'm focusing on too.

I've decided that 2012 will be my year. I want to get healthy. I have too many health issues looming in my family to ignore my health so this year I'm dedicating to me. I've done a number of 5Ks but I'm working toward my first 8K in March. As I said in my Motivation post I'm looking for my motivation but I know that I need to get working on my walking and other exercise to be in shape for that walk.

Next week we start back up with First Place 4 Health so I'll have my official weigh-in next Thursday. Yippee!! Although I don't think it will be too bad because I haven't noticed my clothes getting crazy tight so I'm optimistic. We'll see.

I've also decided to work on cooking at home more. Over the holidays I got very relaxed about going out for lunch and dinner. I need to focus on meals at home and leftovers for lunches. I also want to expand my eating so I've decided to branch out and try some new foods like brussel sprouts and maybe even spaghetti squash. The other day at Uno's I had the most delicious brown rice pilaf with dried cranberries. So I'm looking for new and different recipes to bring some interest to my cooking. For brussel sprouts I found a maple glazed roasted recipe from Weight Watchers and a Balsamic glazed roasted recipe from Pioneer Woman. I'll let you know which one I decide and how they turn out.

So what are you looking forward to in 2012?