I Will Thrive: Asking for Help

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Most Sundays the sermons are good this past Sunday it was a 2x4. It came from 2 Kings 4:1-7 which is the story of the widow who is in danger of losing her sons to pay her husband's debts. She took her concerns to Elisha who's response was "What shall I do for you?." He then told her to go to all of her neighbors and collect pots to put the oil in her house in. She had more than enough oil to fill the pots and when she sold the pots of oil she had more than enough money to save her sons and take care of them. The pastor confessed initially when he heard this story as a child he thought it was about a money or an oil shortage but in reality it was a story about a faith shortage. She had gotten in a rut which became a crisis. And she had not gone to her community until it was almost too late.

He went on to say that in our society today we so often do the same thing she did because we are uncomfortable asking for help. According to him asking for help is not a walk of shame but a walk of faith, with Christ we have community and we should embrace it and allow it to embrace us. He then asked us...are we ready to help our neighbors? Are we ready to ask for help?

This got me thinking about my experiences with this deployment. I read many military blogs and many tell the tales of their spouse being deployed. On many of the pages I read stories about how they rock at deployment, that deployment isn't so bad, etc sort of a I'm a military wife hear me roar kind of thing. And I admit when I first started this deployment back in September of 2010 I took sort of the same attitude. I thought I've lived on my own I can handle this I'll be great. Yeah well somewhere along the way I got slapped with reality. Yes I have lived on my own. Yes I have survived just fine without my husband before he came into my life. Yes I can do this. But I became accustomed to having my husband around the house for company, to help me with things, to do things I don't like doing, to help clean house, help take care of the dogs, for moral support, and yes for physical affection. I am not good at asking for help. 

If I'm having a rough day because I miss him I usually keep it to myself. My yard is mowed by my wonderful neighbor but I need some other yard stuff done like weeding and hedge trimming and I don't ask for help even-though there are people who would be happy to do so. Last Sunday I sat in my driveway on the verge of tears because I missed him so much and I contemplated going to my neighbors house or one of my other friends' houses but I didn't. The reality is if I had gone they would have welcomed me and supported me with open arms, a shoulder, and an ear. But they can't help if I don't ask. I'm getting better. I told my neighbor about it after the fact and she about smacked me for not coming over.

I guess what I'm saying is we are not an island and we don't have to do this alone. We are part of a community whether it is a church community, a military community, or a physical community we belong and we should call upon them. We would want them to call upon us so we need to lead by example and have faith. So ask for help! And be there when your friends and neighbors ask for help.

I Will Thrive: Deployment - Friends

There is a quote "be careful what you wish for" today I'm going to change it to say "be careful what you pray for...you might just get it."

Prior to J leaving I had 3 friends that we're close, 2 of whom were extremely close. We had regular girls nights and such. The day J left for the first time, they invited me over to spend time with them. But as time passed my friend T was much more involved in her various dating relationships and wasn't around as much. My friend S really stepped up. She went to church with me so I didn't have to go alone. We would go out to dinner often so I wasn't home alone. And she was my deployment spouse. She was truly a lifesaver. As time as gone by she has pulled away some because of her relationship with her guy D. When they broke up she was back at a high intensity level. They have started to hang out as friends again so she has disappeared some again. Her explanation for not calling is that she assumes I'm dancing at the Studio, the dogs would prevent me, I'm doing something with my Mom, or that I just have other plans. I told her to call me and see not to assume. ;-)

Because J is a Geo-Bachelor and his "deployment" is three years I realize that I'm a bit more maintenance than if he was on a standard deployment or underway. I realize this so I decided that I need to expand my friend circle so one person isn't responsible for "taking" care of me. I decided to pray about it and ask God to help me expand my circle and for me to be open to new people. Well God heard and God responded.

First my coworker N asked me to join a group on Monday nights for games and possible Bible Study. I went and had a great time so I attend that on a regular basis. A church member and friend where I work invited me to come over for dinner one night after work. I went and had good food, good friends, and a good fire. Then my friends and neighbors invited me to their house for frivolity and dinner. I needed it for a number of reasons. And I again had a great time. And my friend S who hadn't been calling me, called me twice to do something. (granted it was when her man D wasn't available but still the thought was there). Finally, my friend S and I were supposed to go to sunrise service but she wasn't feeling well. Well I almost rolled over and went back to sleep but something kept nagging me to go. So I got dressed and went. I met a delightful couple who normally attend a different service. He was retired Coast Guard so they got the military aspect. They invited me (and treated me) to breakfast on Easter morning. It was wonderful company and food.

God never ceases to amaze me. But I know now...be careful when you pray...you might just get it.

Shrove Tuesday

Today is Shrove Tuesday. It is the day before Ash Wednesday and the start of Lent. In our family we have almost always had pancakes for dinner on Shrove Tuesday. I never fully understood it as a child but I sure loved eating pancakes. Now working in a church we have an annual pancake supper done by our youth and it is interesting to see how many people come to it. I think it is two fold...it is free and it is tradition. So I will be eating pancakes once again as I get ready to start the season of Lent.

Which leads me to my next topic since tomorrow is Ash Wednesday I have had to do some thinking about what I'm going to give up or take on. A number of years ago a pastor suggested that instead of giving something up for Lent that we take something on, daily Bible reading, helping in a retirement home, helping at a Youth Center, daily meditation, yoga, etc whatever would be a challenge for us and would help us grow in our faith.

This year I've decided to take something on. And like many other Lenten things it is a bit self-serving but it will also be a reminder for me that Jesus suffered for me. I've decided to take on exercise particularly walking the dogs. It is something I should be doing but I haven't been motivated. And I know I'm not taking the best care of my body aka the temple of the Holy Spirit so I would like to do a better job. So there it is out in the open.

What are you giving up or taking on for Lent? Do you celebrate Lent?

My Observations About the Christmas Story

So in  honor of Christmas I thought I would include some of my observations about the Christmas story...

• Mary was 14 years old, a virgin, and pledged to an older man. When she became pregnant by the Holy Spirit you can imagine some issues with parents and her betrothed. I can tell you I did not have enough faith at 14 to have handled all that as gracefully as she did. But she had faith.

• Joseph always amazes me. He could have publicly humiliated her but that didn't cross his mind he was going to walk away quietly. But after the angels came to him he too had faith. 

• I cannot imagine being pregnant. But I certainly cannot imagine being pregnant and riding on a donkey. Again Mary had faith.

• Shepherds were considered to be low in society at that time. They were not people you would invite to your home let alone the birth of your child. And yet God felt they too needed to be part of the birth. It takes all kinds.

• The Three Wise Men took risks to find the baby Jesus and keep him hidden from Harrod. They too had faith.

• The inn keeper always tweaks me a little bit because I feel like he could have done more for them. And yet I realize that there was a point to Jesus being born in a lowly manger. Here was the King of Kings being born in a feeding trough. God always has a plan we may just not understand it at the time.

This time of year I think it is easy to get lost in the details of presents and trees and parties, etc. But I wanted to take a moment and share some observations I've had over the years about the Christmas story.

What are your observations?

Judgement vs Accountability

So I have been reading Resolution for Women and I went to see Courageous the movie. Both of them are very good and have had me taking a serious look at my faith and how I'm living it out. It has raised some questions for myself and brought about some conversations with friends.

The major one has been the difference between being judgmental and holding someone accountable. I think as Christians we are called to hold each other accountable for our actions. And my friends says that we are not to judge. I could argue both sides easily. Because we shouldn't judge others but at the same time as Christians if we see a fellow Christian going down a path of destruction I think we are called to call them back. It doesn't have to be in a judgmental way but sometimes it needs to be in a firm manner. Then she made an interesting comment that struck me...she said it isn't fair to be held accountable for things of the past. But I guess the way I look at it is I'm responsible for the past, present, and future of the life I live because they have been, are, and will be my choices. Then I wonder if I'm looking at this too cut and dry. Is there a grey area where we aren't accountable? Should we let people go about their lives and let them live the way they want? Is tough love outdated?

So this is the topic that's been running around in my head. How can we hold people accountable without being judgmental? 

First Place 4 Health - Weight loss journey

When I was born the doctors were concerned because I was so little. They were worried I was underfed. I was on the low end of the weight chart for most of my early childhood. And then I hit 4th grade...it is weird for some reason that year we had two pictures taken one at the beginning of the year and one at the end. At the beginning I was skinny and slim faced by the end my face was round. Two things happened my 4th grade year. The first I hit puberty but that only brought a little weight. The second we learned we were moving to Maine from Alaska. I'd lived there since I was two I didn't know anywhere else. My mother was very very connected to her church and had a hard time with this move. Because of this there was a lot of emotional eating in our household. Lots of baked goods, high fat foods, and lots of trips to McDonald's and Mister Donut. Our trek from Alaska to Maine included lots of stops at McDonald's and Dairy Queen and very little activity.

Since then I've struggled with my weight. I was always heavier than most of my friends. In high school I had some luck losing weight but I gained it back my senior year. Then in college I lost some weight. But when I got into the relationship with my now ex-husband I gained a lot of weight due to emotional eating and unhealthy meals. I will say this I'm excellent with maintenance. I've remained within about 5-10 pounds of that weight. I've had several 10-15 pound loses but then I have 10-20 pound gains.

This time is different. So far since January 6th I've lost 6 lbs and every week I've had a loss. And here are some of my thoughts on why...

• I'm leading the class so I want to be a good example
• I'm not making drastic changes but I am making changes
• I'm trying to sneak in activity 
• I don't feel deprived
• I've almost completely given up my Coke drinking addiction (I occasionally have a kids Coke at a fast food resturant)
• I'm getting balanced with mind, body, spirit, and heart
• I'm doing Bible study daily
• I'm putting more faith in God and myself
• I'm putting Christ first in my life
• I'm putting myself first

I'm hoping the success continues because J and I are planning on meeting the end of this year and I want to knock his socks and possibly other articles of clothing off. Both of us are getting healthier...he's lost 20 lbs since he left.

Amish Grace

Friday morning I watched the movie "Amish Grace" it is based on the events that occurred in Nickel Mines at the Amish school house in October of 2006. This is an amazing movie. It is well written and touching. (a bit gut wrenching at times) There is a book by the same title that I still want to read too. In the real life story and in the movie I was moved by the forgiveness the families and the whole Amish community was able to offer to the shooters wife and family. Throughout the movie they talked about how it was their call from God to forgive. And how anger only ate at their heart it didn't hurt the shooter at all. It was such an amazing story of forgiveness in an almost unforgivable situation.

I cannot recommend the movie enough it was a wonderful movie and ultimately a testimony to forgiveness. 

Maundy Thursday

Today is Maundy Thursday. Today we celebrate Christ having his last supper with his disciples. Today he told them that one of the would betray him. Today he prayed in the Garden for the cup to pass him by. Today he prayed "not my will but your will." Today he is arrested.

And so begins the time of remembering Jesus' ultimate sacrifice for us. It is so easy to focus on the celebration of Easter. But we wouldn't have the resurrection without the time before it. 

Laying the Foundation...

In all things there first has to be a foundation...

When you build a house you don't just throw up walls and a roof without first putting up a solid foundation to support them. When you are making a necklace you have to pick proper stringing material to support your finished design or you will end up with a faulty necklace. When working with youth in church work you have to realize you are laying the foundation.

This past weekend a group of seven crazy brave adults took 20 middle school youth on a weekend retreat 8 hours away at a Methodist retreat center called Lake Junaluska. It was an experience. Middle schoolers are a tough bunch...they aren't children any more but they aren't adults. They aren't even teens in many cases. They were a good group of youth but they are middle schoolers so we had moments.

There was one youth who caused us some trouble because they (I'm trying not to identify) thought they were too cool to be there. But on Saturday night after the worship service we took all of them on a "hike" (walk up the hill) to the cross in silence. They did a good job. And it was meaningful to all including them. It is moments like that they make it worthwhile.

We may not see the impact this trip made on them until later but I know from personal experience that a good foundation leads to a good adult...even if the road is a little bumpy along the way.

Confirmation Retreat

In the United Methodist Church confirmation is a big deal. It is the time after baptism (usually decided by your parents) where you as a youth get to make a decision to join the church. As a church it is an exciting time because youth are learning about Methodism and are excited about  joining.

This weekend as part of their Confirmation process we are taking a group of them to Lake Junaluska. They have weekend retreats for the spiritual growth of the youth. My hubby and I have been asked to chaperone. And although we will be partially responsible for 19+ youth it will be a neat experience for us too.

There is worship, history, workshops, free time, and other fun stuff that will keep the youth busy. Last time I went the girls in my room and I had a "mini-slumber" party each night before bed. This time the arrangements are such that we can't do that. But I will tell you that discussing faith with 6th-8th graders helps you look at your own faith.

My ex was agnostic. And I fully believe that you should believe or not believe whatever you would like I'm not going to force my beliefs on you. But I am a Christian and I want to be with a Christian because it works better. The day my hubby and I got married we made a commitment in front of God to each other. It meant something to us. As part of our journey we go to church and participate in church related things. I'm glad that he enjoys and is willing to do things like this with me.

"But as for me and my household we will serve the Lord."  ~ Joshua 24:15b

And in 2010....

In the past I've always been a resolution girl....

Some of my past resolutions:
(in no particular order)

• lose weight
• lose a husband
• gain a boyfriend
• get closer to God
• get healthier
• get closer to friends
• lose weight
• get a different job
• graduate from college
• go back to school

So this year I've decided no resolutions...but I like the idea of goals so here are my goals for 2010

• Be closer to God by participating at church and reading the Bible
  
• Be healthier by going to the Y more regularly and planning our meals to be healthier
• Be a better housekeeper by doing little things sooner rather than waiting for the big mess
• Be a better wife by listening more and talking less
• Be a better pet mommy by giving them more boundaries and more of my direct time
• Be a business starter by making jewelry and purses to sell
• Be a better friend by initiating contact and not waiting...the phone amazingly works both ways
• I'm sure there's more but this will keep my busy...lol
  

Grinch vs. Who

How the Grinch Stole Christmas is one of my favorite Christmas movies because I think it really does show the real meaning of Christmas. And I think the Grinch gets a bad wrap really. Yes he does try to ruin Christmas but then he saves the day and realizes what Christmas is all about. And ultimately Christmas is about forgiveness so I think we can all learn a lesson or two from this seemingly simple Christmas story.

How many of us at one time or another have had a Grinchy attitude toward something. That we must figure out a way to stop it or ruin it. Or just didn't want to participate.

I admit since I started working in a church I have a little less of the Who spirit and more of the Grinch until Christmas Eve...then I'm totally Who. We constantly have services, events, etc that seem to cause a crazy amount of stress for all involved but always look great at the end. And it amazes me how in a time of year when we are focusing on God's greatest gift to us we forget and focus on petty issues that really don't mean anything.

The true meaning of Christmas is celebrating God's love of us and the gift of his Son. And I admit it is easy to forget these things in the midst of preparing for Christmas with shopping, events, gatherings, etc. I myself often forget the true reason for the season. Although I often think it is to eat cookies, baked goods, heavy meals until I can't move it is really all about Him.

I'll finish with my favorite Grinch quote..."He puzzled and puzzled till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before! Maybe Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas... perhaps... means a little bit more!"

Love is...

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ~ 1 Corinthians 13:4-6

The part of this verse that has been striking a cord with me a lot lately is "it keeps no record of wrongs." I am a firm believer in the philosophy of forgive...but hold onto it forever. I am working on this. I know it is not healthy. I know that you haven't really forgiven if you keep the record of wrongs. When J and I went through our "pre-marital" counseling recently our wonderful Pastor had us read this passage and focused in particular on the part about letting go and not keeping a record of wrongs. But he told us that God played a horrible trick on us women because he gave us an amazing memory. So we have the ability to remember the wrongs but the grace to let them go.

I think God forgot to give me the grace to let them go. Currently we are dealing with an issue with an acquaintance who shall be referred to as S from here on out. S has a tendency to call when something is needed. And has on more than one occasion made the situation seem like S wants to come spend time with us...but while I'm there can you do? or can I use? or can I...? or can you...? It is tough because I'm not sure S is aware of this behavior but it is causing a wedge. J and I think we should talk to S about this but we're not sure it would do any good. But in communication it is always important to communicate your feelings even if the other side doesn't hear them at least you have done what you could. But S has a tendency to take things a bit personally so we don't want to make it feel like an attack. And we are trying to let go of the past things but at the same time we don't want to be doormats either.

So we're praying about this situation and how to deal with it. And in the meantime we are trying to forget...as well as forgive....

My first 5K

So this weekend was filled once again...but fortunately not a food fest.

Friday after work I went to the salon to get my hair back to my natural color. I got there at 3:30 PM. I didn't leave until 8:00 PM. I had dyed my hair black and so it had to be bleached three times to get the color out. Then she put a glaze and a few highlights to brighten it back up again. Apparently 3 times of being bleached is rough on hair... who'd of thunk. But Carol did an amazing job. When I got home J was in a bit of an off mood and I was exhausted. So when he hit me with the idea of going me going to our friends' house to spend time with K while he went to see "Paranormal Activity" with R I thought he was crazy. But it worked out she was exhausted and not up for it so the boys went to the movie on their own. He tried to talk me into going but I knew I would not like scary so I passed. He got home late and said it was the scariest movie he'd ever seen. So glad I didn't go...I cleaned house instead. Much better...

Saturday we went with our friends Traci and Sheila and Traci's guy, Gary to walk/run the 5K at the Shipyard. J ran it, Traci and Gary ran/walked it, and Sheila and I walked it. All and all we were happy. Then we went to IHOP for breakfast which was good because we were starving. When we got home I showered and went to Pin Ups for my haircut. (It was supposed to happen last night but it was so late it got rescheduled to today) It turned out great...Jackie is amazing. Then I got home relaxed a bit and we went to Johnny and Rachael's for their open house. We had fun and good food. Then we stopped at Tony's for a bit and came home.

Sunday we went to church...then we stopped by Rod and Kendra's to pick up our heater. We hung out for a bit talking to Rod and Kendra. They are wonderful people. Then we went to lunch/dinner with Mom and Dad at the German restaurant. Very yummy! Then we went to Care-a-Lot for pet stuff and to Food Lion for people stuff. Then home. All and all a good weekend but way too short.

I'm Just Saying

I work in a church. I am not a pastor. I have designed worship bulletins and even planned worship services in a crunch. I like to tell stories to people. I would ultimately love to become a public story teller. Possibly a pastor but I don't think so...but I am going to share one of my favorite stories...

"Lost and Found"
When I was little probably around 5 maybe 6 my Mom and I went to the BX (base exchange) one afternoon to do some shopping. Now as a child I liked to explore, wander, walk off, etc. whatever you want to call it. But I was usually pretty good at keeping Mom in eye shot. On this particular afternoon I wandered one direction and Mom obviously wandered another. When I turned to find her she was gone. I started to look for her but could not find her anywhere. I began to get concerned...about that time a nice lady found me and took me to the front of the store to the staff people. I explained I'd lost my Mommy. They assured me it would be fine they would help me find her. The real thing was I hadn't lost my Mommy at all I had wandered away from her and gotten lost. The very nice clerk asked me what my Mommy's name was...my response "Mommy" she said "yes but what is her real name"...again "Mommy." So she thought she'd try a different approach "what does your Daddy call her?" I stopped and thought (probably giving a glimmer of hope) and replied "Your Mom." The clerk was just getting ready to try another approach when my Mom showed up. She had been looking for me the whole time. And she decided that the front of the store was the best place to find me. She came to me. I think the clerk was relieved because she didn't have to figure out who my Mom was from my vague answers. And Mom was relieved that I was OK.

The beauty of this story for me is that this is a perfect illustration of my faith journey. I started out with God. We were doing great. I might go exploring but God was always in my eye line. Then one time God was no longer in my eye line...but not because He had moved because I had moved away. And I admit it took me a bit to get to someone who could help me get back to Him. But the beauty of the story is I didn't have to find God. He was looking for me...I was lost but now am found. I admit the song "Amazing Grace" makes me teary every time. "I once was lost but now am found, twas blind but now I see." We do not have to find God. He is always there even when we do not see Him and particularly when we don't want to see him. I admit I often chuckle when people say "I've found God" or "I've found Jesus." I want to look at them and say "I didn't know they were missing." I am glad that God and Jesus are in their lives don't get me wrong...nothing brings me more joy. But I want them to realize...they were lost and God has found them not the other way around.

The Lord has promised good to me.
His word my hope secures.
He will my shield and portion be,
As long as life endures.

It is through my faith that I have made it this far in my life. And I'm not sure how you do it without faith.

I'm getting older...

So I'm not sure when this happened but I'm getting older. How do I know this? Well the obvious signs...gray hairs, youth that I babysat when they were 5 years old are now graduating from college, music and tv shows that were new when I was young are now "classic," clothing I wore is now making a "come back", and of course looking at myself in the mirror. Although I've been told I really haven't changed much since high school.

OK...pictures...see for yourself...

My high school graduation picture...1995....

My profile picture from 2006. You be the judge...lol








Another major thing that is telling me I'm getting older...friends parents dying. I'm not sure when my generation got old enough to start losing parents. Some had died due to cancer but now we're losing them to age. A friend of mine's (from youth group) mother died this week. I hadn't really talked to my friend or her mother in years but I adored her mother. She was the kind of woman who brought enthusiasm and joy to everything she did. She was a teacher and taught many both in and out of school. She will be missed. And my heart and prayers go out to my friend. I can't imagine losing my Mom. The thought makes me teary eyed. I know that her mother is in a better place but I'm sure my friend would rather have her here. Life is short...tell those around you that you love them often. And pray for those who have lost loved ones.

I've learned that...

Sometimes I'm in a bad mood and I don't know why. And sometimes in a ironic joke that bad mood coincides with my "monthly visitor". I have to tell you that the consequences of this crossing are bad... "Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria!" (Ghostbusters quote) bad. And the worst part of it is that J often gets the brunt of it because he's the one I go home to. It isn't fair to him I know this so I try to keep it under control. But last night I couldn't control it...and he dealt with me as he usually does. He balances me the way I balance him.

And it is interesting because although we have days where he is a jerkish or I'm a bit of a witch we get through them because we respect each other, love each other, and talk. Sometimes in the moment we seem lost but we always get to the other side. Both of us have been through divorce...I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy it sucks, but it was also one of my best learning experiences about myself, other people, and the world. I try to take the wisdom that I gained from that experience and pass it on to others. Sometimes they listen, sometimes they decide to go the trial and error route, and sometimes they tell me to shut-up. (Mostly they say thank you.) And so for today I want to share some things I've learned that...

• If you have something to say...say it to the person not about them. No problem is solved by triangulating someone else into the equation. Deal with the person. It will help you and them. (Exception: I believe professional counseling can help in a lot of cases...and recommend it to people often...a neutral third party is a blessing.)
• It is not always just the other person's fault. All too often in life we try and put the blame on someone else...our parents, siblings, friends, significant others, etc. The reality is a relationship has two people...which means two people bring gifts and two people bring challenges. If you think it is all the other person's fault take a good look at yourself and see what have you brought to the situation...is it all good? (Exception: In the case of abusive situations it is not the victims fault...it is all the fault of the the abuser. Get out of that situation.)
• You cannot truly love someone if you don't truly respect them. And vise versa...if someone does not truly respect you they can't truly love you. Don't put up with people who don't treat you with respect. Address the situation (calmly) and if it does not change reaccess the situation and see if it is worth staying. Sometimes people cannot respect you because they do not respect themselves. And realize you may still love them and that may not change. That is OK.
  
• Change is good...but be aware not everyone will like it. Change is inevitable. And it can be exciting, frightening, challengeing, growth inspiring, and benefitial. But sometimes personal change will occur in spite of what is going on with the other person. Respect where they are...they are not where you are but that is OK.
  
• You have to have faith. Some would say have faith in something...I say have faith in God. God is an amazing God. No matter what happens God is there and will never leave you. God wants to have a relationship with you. How you have this relationship is personal but for me it comes from my art, my work, and prayer. For you it may be totally different...that is OK.
• Patience is a virtue. God does not work in our time. If we got everything we wanted when we wanted it the world would be in chaos. And if you want to make God laugh...tell God your plans. The cliche is true...good things come to those who wait. "If you rush a miracle, you'll get a bad miracle." Mad Max, Princess Bride
• There are good people out there. Unfortunately the reverse is true. But have faith that the good will prevail. And don't give up hope. Even if you have encountered bad people in your life don't become cynical...continue to love and trust just be a bit more picky about who you trust. Assume the best not the worst.
• COMMUNICATE...COMMUNICATE...COMMUNICATE I have a degree in Communication so I admit that I feel very strongly about the importance of communication. But I cannot emphasize this enough...so many problems can and would be resolved if people communicated. Don't assume that you know what someone meant...talk to them and confirm it. Don't assume they know what you meant either. You know what happens when you make assumptions.
  
• Forgiveness is the best gift you can give. There are people in your life who will hurt you intentially and unintentially. You at some point need to forgive them even if they don't ask for it. Yes this is hard. No I won't pretend that I'm good at it. But when I have truly forgiven people I feel better. And I remind myself that Jesus was betrayed by the very people he came to save and his final words were to ask God to forgive them.
  
• Laughter is wonderful. A serious life is a wasted life. "Those who can laugh at themselves will never cease to be amused." (not sure who said that) I believe that laughter can heal and that laughter gets us through a lot of crap. J makes me laugh often sometimes at him and sometimes with him. It is one of the many many things I love about him.
• You need to take care of yourself. Eat well, exercise, relax, pamper yourself, read, do what makes you happy at least once a day. You are of no use to others if you don't take care of yourself.
  
• Last but not least love.
  

Believe the Love Story

J and I go to a great church. The church family is welcoming and encouraging, the pastor is a wonderful preacher and counselor, and they have a great choir. We started attending there in October and just finished our membership class recently.

Yesterday morning our Pastor was on fire while preaching. He was preaching on the scripture from Mark 4:35-41...the story of Jesus calming the storm. His title was "Have You Still No Faith?" related to the question Jesus asked the disciples because they were afraid and concerned about their safety during the storm. They had been with Jesus through so many things and yet they still were afraid of what might happen and unsure of the outcome.

I admit this makes me feel better about my own faith. If the men who walked on earth with Jesus and knew first hand of God's love had concerns and doubt then me having doubt is normal right? Pastor C went on to talk about how God is with us in the storms of life...both the literal hurricanes that hit our area but more importantly the storms of life that aren't predicted. The loss of a job, financial struggles, the loss of a loved one, a child gone astray, difficulties in marriage, divorce, etc those are also storms in our life and God is with us. I needed this sermon. I have a great life...I have my faith, I have a wonderful family, I have a good job, I have an amazing boyfriend, I have a great group of friends, etc. I am not in a major storm. I have been through some in my life but not right now. I am however in a minor storm. And I realized that I need to have faith. I need to trust that God is there and will be there. Life will be fine. God has never let me down and I don't see it happening now. I have faith. For some this sounds cliched. For me this is a fact. I don't know how you do it without God. I don't want to find out.

Pastor C gave the following quote as a summary of his sermon..."Faith is not a human action but it is a reaction to the love of God." God wants us to believe the Love Story. God loves us...because God loves us we have faith. All love begins with God. My love for others is a reflection of God's love for me.

I am loved. I have faith. I love others. God loves you.

Love the honesty...

I love the honesty of this post by Mrs. Classic at Weight Watchers Changed My Life.

Church Membership Class lesson 4 - Baptism

Last night at our church membership class we learned about the United Methodist's belief about baptism. Most of it I knew but I did learn a few things along the way. And in honor of it I want to share a YouTube clip. In this clip a child cannonballs into the baptismal font. And the pastor is caught off guard. It is a humorous clip. But the clip isn't what got my attention the comments are what got my attention. People are getting into a very theological discussion about how if this youth doesn't take his baptism seriously he shouldn't get baptised, etc. And I look at it very differently but I often do... I think all of us should have that enthusiasm about becoming a child of God. I for one think that baptism is a celebration and should be fun. We are becoming a part of God's family. God is claiming us and if it is an older person we are claiming God. If that isn't a reason for celebration I don't know what is. Besides who said faith and church have to be serious? Shouldn't we be having fun? I for one think my faith is fun and my God is one who most definately has a sense of humor.